Connect and be Aware

"Do we loose track of time because we lack the awareness with both our surroundings and with people?"


I was driving down the snow blown highway; radio off, enjoying the silence, eagerly to listening to my own thoughts. How often do I honor my time with silence...not enough.

I've been impressed with the connections found in my circle these days. It would come across that we are all connected and in the lesbian culture of Alberta, this is true. Because this massive circle of beautiful women is so small and because of the ridiculous nature of women suppressing one another with gossip (or at least stirring up the ego-chatter), we will always have mellow drama. I feel that this ego-chatter in women tends to be either self-destructive or manipulative - both negative - so why spend so much energy on something so insulting? It appears that we have already forgotten about karma, self-fulfilling prophecy, wwjd, Buddha, chakras lines, or just plain and simple love and joy? For myself, I push and challenge these boundaries in relationships and friendships and understandably, some cut off ties and some openly accept the challenge.

"I just wanna love, will anybody understand. I see you there, already you're in my arms..."

I realize that my number one priority with people in my realm is honesty. To the many people that I have spoken with, we've all experienced a breach in trust; financially, physically, psychologically, and most commonly, emotionally. Perhaps some people don't even recognize the mistrust placed in their lives or, it's just not a concern. I base decisions through reflection on my past experiences...which creates a conflict for someone like myself who's motto falls under the principle of "innocent until proven guilty". However, with dishonesty at one end, lies at the other, everything that falls in between, is a loophole for relationships. Similar to the grey area between the truth and the whole truth.

People are not intentionally trying to cause hurt or mistrust. I feel that it's a fact that people are simply unaware of their surroundings. I sense a general unawareness first, of oneself, then, of loved ones (family and friends), and finally, everyone else. It goes back to this sensation I get when watching people who overanalyze, dramatize, or disassociate themselves from words or actions. Everything we do is a part of this grand connection - whether it's personal circles, community circles, or global circles. As we mature, no matter what our age, I would hope that we start looking at ourselves honorable and treat one another as if we walked in those shoes.... chances are, based on the lovers web, we already have.

"This time and place, is just a small part of your life. Your life is bigger than this and everyday, we should celebrate it together"

Top Five - Simple Humanity
1) We are not all in the same book, let alone the same page. Understanding grace, helps foster this awareness.
2) My regrets exist only from my ignorance or dishonesty either to others or myself.
3) Dream big, but only objectively. Subjective dreams hold too many expectations that have caused ungrateful experiences, unfair to both myself and to others.
4) Thinking that I have no control over others in how they feel is just naive. My words and actions lead to opinions formed by others and, in turn, affect any relationship.
5) Intentionally sharing only part of the truth reflects dishonesty; eventually, the full story always reveals itself and comes full circle.